Adoption.

Instead of going to regular church service this morning, Ryan and I decided to go to a "Considering Adoption" class through a ministry at RiverTree called "Born in Our Hearts". For some reason, since I was young, I've always had this idea that I would love to adopt a child. And since the early days of Ryan and I getting to know each other and then being in a serious relationship, and then getting married we've talked more and more seriously about whether or not this is something the Lord is calling us to do. Both of us, the more we think and the more we talk, feel like this is something we would absolutely want to do. I can't explain it, but I just feel a pull toward the many (TOO many) children in this country and internationally that need to know God's love through a loving family. And even if it was just one, we'd love to change a life by taking a child in. This class was certainly helpful, and gave us some good information. One one obstacle (be it a very large one) is the financial aspect. To adopt domestically it's usually between $12,000- $20,000. To adopt internationally is even more expensive- somewhere between $20,000-$40,000. Much of this money to needs to be paid upfront along the way of the adoption process, so the funds need to be there and readily available when needed. This, as I'm sure for most people, is so daunting and something we absolutely do not have. It's so disheartening- a huge mountain in the way of what could be our calling. It's easy for people to say "Just trust in God, and if this is what He wants for you and your family, He will provide." (And Lord knows, I DO believe that to be true.) But my ever-practical mind just cannot seem to look past this huge road block. It's hard to have a dream yet see no viable way to fulfill it.

We have been starting to read up on and follow Dave Ramsey's ("Financial Peace Revisited") advice on how to start eliminating debt and getting to a place where we can start saving more money. But this is such a long, slow process when you have a car loan, student loans, and a mortgage (not to mention the monthly living expenses, bills, and one child to care for already) that it seems we could be retired before we'd have to funds to adopt a child.

All that said, maybe it's just time to trust and obey- and pray (a lot) to discern if this could really be the next step for our family in the future.